"KING" HARPER'S DEATH KNELL

King Harper has certainly pulled a beheading kingly
life terminating maneuver this past month. Thinking that
he could scorch the opposition parties with burning oil he
introduced a nation numbing Economic Statement that pulled
the financial life buoy from the red ink drowning Liberals,
New Democrats and Bloc Quebecois. The Greens were left
hugging their trees, hoping the carbon induced smog clouds
would clear for falling green manna from heaven.

Not satisfied, King Harper then went on to attack the
King's own serfs, the slave driven civil servants,
particularly the underpaid one-parent family supporting women,
by proclaiming that henceforth, they shall not have any voice
in deciding what is equitable pay -- sending them into
pre-suffragette frenzy.

"I AM KING!" he shouted.

For His greedy corporate barons, His Economic Statement
added more tax reducing slop to their overflowing troughs
while increasing questionable billions to the almost invisible
2500 military personnel among 32 million Afghans.

The King's Earls, however, not having read the Economic
Proclamation, wet themselves with fear, knowing that their
measly 143 seats could not withstand an all-out onslaught
from the other non-faithful 165 Earls who were brandishing
their sharpened swords across the hallowed parliamentary floor.

"Democracy?" King Harper shouted, "Never heard of it!"

Poor Duke Dion, unable to issue a clear troop command, lost
the respect of his Earls, Knights and commoners and had to
prop up his opposing authority by forming an unholy
tri-alliance with the mom-and-pop business destroying New
Democrats and the wailing "Let's Leave Canada" Bloc Quebecois.

King Harper, recognizing foolish usurpation immediately,
sent His news machinations throughout the land, denouncing
feeble stumbling Duke Dion, his impoverished minions and
the dreaded Quebecois beasts.

"My Kingdom shall not fall! We will attack traitorous
Quebec first!" rallied the King.

Then His Queen, the globe trotting party loving Governor
General, waved her crystal wand and closed the sacred
doors to the halls of wisdom and freedom.

Suddenly, the Wizards appeared - those ancient Liberal
sorcerers who immediately cast a spell-binding quieting Fog
from sea to sea over all the troubled agitated lands;
rewriting the King's messages using mind altering runes.

The Wizards peacefully laid Duke Dion to rest in an imprisoned
cave of self imposed reflections and set forth to find a
shining Knight of hope, truth and charity. A Knight with
a magic Economic Sword to defeat the King.

A tongue-in-cheek political commentary...December 8, 2008, by Gerald Tooley